Send Me an Angel
by kEEpEr of da bEEz
Summary: NejiNaru, AU, Neji POV. Neji and Naruto attend the same boarding school. Neji is cold and detached from the world, but some how Naruto manages to worm his way into the Hyuga’s heart.
1. the beginning,well,duh

Summary: NejiNaru, AU, Neji POV. Neji and Naruto attend the same boarding school. Neji is cold and detached from the world, but some how Naruto manages to worm his way into the Hyuga's heart.

Disclaimer: …no, I don't own Naruto,… that is, only until I take over the world evil cackle

Notes: You may be wondering why I am writing this instead of working on my other fic, … Well, one day I was sitting in the cardboard box that is my room, in the basement of the house that I live in, listening to the rats and roaches as they scuttled around, and clutching my shotgun to protect me from the evil mutated beavers, and lo' and behold I was visited by lady fate, the mistress of inspiration, and several of said beavers. It was a beautiful weekend and I was left alone by all of man kind with my trusty DVD player, a stack of DVDs and a box of saltine crackers. You may be wondering about the saltine crackers, but they are my newest fetish, so you might not want to know…. Eh-heh… Well I spent the weekend gorging on the boob tube (and no this is not a reference to pornography) and my muse CAME BACK! All shall rejoice! Okay, so maybe not, but still, it works. Oh, and I know this is not the story where I should be focusing my new-found inspiration, but hey, beggars can't be choosers…And I think I'm gonna start the story now….Eh-heh…

_Do you believe_

_In heaven above?_

_Do you believe _

_In love?_

Yet again, Neji was glaring holes into his bedroom wall. This was starting to seem like a ritual lately, now that he was trying to isolate himself from his family.

_'Damn him to hell, can't stay out of my business, now can he?'_

Neji's glare intensified as the object of both his loathing and love came into his room.

_'I don't need your help… at least not in this way…'_

Flashback

Neji was struggling down the hall of his abhorrent school, carrying all the council work from the last meeting, all of which he had to complete during his lunch hour. He damned the fact that he was an overachiever and that everyone else on the student council was so damn incompetent. Yet again they had managed to dump all the work on him, the lazy bastards. And this time, it was not only all the regular work, but the plans for the class trip as well. He should sabotage it just to get them in trouble…

A flash of blonde

came rushing around the corner from the lunch room and knocked into Neji, causing all the paper to go cascading all over the place.

"Watch where you are going moron," growled Neji before looking up at the adorable blonde sitting on the floor in front of him.

Neji almost blushed, but then stopped himself. Sure he might have a major crush on the blonde in front of him, but it was rude to dash around without looking where you were going.

"Gomen...Gomen nasai Neji-sempai!" Naruto's eyes widened, obviously not expecting to run into the student council PRESIDENT, and for said president to call him a moron.

"Whatever, just help me pick up the papers. Neji caved into the blonde's shocked look, he couldn't stay mad at that face. That, and the fact that he was hoping for one of those cheesy "both people reach for the same paper, touch each other's hand, look into each other's eyes, and fall madly in love" scenes that you see in all the chick flics around today. And one of the secret fetishes of Hyuga Neji just so happened to be watching those cheesy chick flics...

"Mou... Hey, are these the plans for the class trip? Where are we going?" Naruto asked conversationally.

"I haven't decided yet."

"Oh... Hey, wait, isn't the whole council supposed to decide that together?"

"Well, we would, if the others actually decided to put forth effort every once in a while." Neji said bitterly.

"You mean you're the only one that is doing the work? That isn't very fair! Why are there any of those other people on the council then?"

"Because the council election is more of a popularity competition than anything else, and nobody seems to care that mostly morons not even qualified to pick their own nose are making decisions that affect the whole school."

"Say what?"

"Never mind, just hand me those papers over there."

"Wow, what are all these?"

"Just more council work..."

"And you have to do it all yourself?"

"...Yes..."

"Wow, that's a lot of work!"

"And that's an understatement."

"Huh?... Well, you still need help, either way."

"Well, duh..."

"I'll help you!" The blonde said enthusiastically

"WHA?"

"Cool, come on lets go!" Naruto grabbed Neji's arm and dragged him down the hall.

"Let go of me." Neji mumbled, almost blushing again.

"What did you say?"

'Nothing, just go to the library."

Naruto careened down one hallway, and then another, never pausing to see where they were going. He just dashed headlong into whatever came in his way.

_'He's really hurt himself one day if he keeps going around like this.'_

One-hour later-

'Holy cow Neji-sempai! We're not even nearly done yet! How do you do this everyday? It's just crazy!"

"...I manage..."

"It must be tough...' Naruto prattled on and on. Not that Neji minded the company, he quite enjoyed it, although he had to make sure he wasn't drooling every once in a while. The problem was the fact that Naruto never seemed to run out of things to say, and Neji was torn between jumping him or ripping out his vocal cords.

"Well, I'll just meet you after school then, how 'bout by the student parking lot?"

"Huh?" _' What is this moron talking about?'_

"Well, I was just offering my help so you could finish those papers after school, and you said yes..." Naruto was confused, and when he was confused, he got the cutest little wrinkles on his forehead that Neji just wanted to kiss...

"Uh..."

_'Crap'_

End flashback

Now Naruto was at his house, in his room, and there was no one else there but the two boys and again Neji's patients were being strained...

_' Hmmm, should I jump him now... or just beat him senseless to stop all that noise?'_

Well, Neji, this is what you get for letting your mind wander and leaving your mouth on autopilot...

TBC

Rants: ... ... ... Review...please?...shivers in her cardboard box it's so cold...


	2. disturbing

Summary: Ugh, just go look at the one on the first chapter, I am lazy and I dunna' wanna' type it again...

Disclaimer: See above statement...

Authors note: Sooooooo sad! I had this chapter written out perfectly, and then I typed it up, and then threw out my rough draft, and then my bitchy computer goes and deletes it on me! And then I tried writing it over and ...it sucks now, and I hate it very much so I just scrapped all my retries and decided to just type whatever came to me... Yes, hogo-chan, karma is a bitch, just like gravity and spelling tests... and these damn beavers who think that if they get control of my brain, they can use me to take over the world... stupid things, they don't seem to realize that no one listens to my psycho babble anyways, so it won't make a difference...

Imaginary friend #1: I listen to you Sara-chan!

Sara-chan: Awww! I love you! And if you ever call me Sara-chan again, I will use your entrails to hang you from a flagpole!

All imaginary friends back away at this point

Sara-chan: So ... Yeah, read and review, oh and I'll even let you people name my imaginary friends... If that isn't love, I don't know what is!

Imaginary friends: Hey, We didn't agree to that!

Sara-chan: You will if you want to see tomorrow smiles evilly... Eh-heh heh heh heh... Oh and I do apologize for any OOC-ness, but as a rabid fan girl, it's only right that I blatantly ignore any and all flaws of my favorite characters...

Imaginary friends: Hey! What about us?

Sara-chan: che, I don't even know you ... you...thinks really hard, head explodes...you nameless morons!

Imaginary friends: Whisper suspiciously in a dark and forboding way Okay, so that's the plan to bring her to her untimely demise cackles heard Hey Sara-chan, do you want a cookie?

Sara-chan: smiles With imaginary friends like these, who needs real ones? Yay, cookies!...(To be continued)

Send Me an Angel, Chapter 2:

Don't tell a lie

Don't be false

or untrue

It all comes back

to you

Naruto was in awe, and although this happened quite often, THIS was still amazing. "Wow, Neji-sempai! Your room is so huge, I could fit my whole apartment in here!"

"You mean your parent's apartment." Naruto flinched at that statement, and Neji wondered what the blonde was hiding about himself. 'Probably nothing important, but then again...' Neji looked over at the other boy who was currently nosing through his stuff.

"You want something to drink Naruto-kun?"

"Uh sure, do you have any Mountain Dew?"

'Maybe that explains his hyperactivity(1)...' "I think so"

Neji went and got both of them refreshments, Naruto his highly caffienated sugar water, and for himself he got a cup of iced tea. By the time he had gotten back to his dorm room, there were several unwanted guests that were visiting with Naruto, namely Shino, Sakura, Ino, Shikamaru, Choji, and Lee.'That kid attracts attention like honey attracts flies, ...now if only these people would leave...' Neji thought wistfully.

All of these people obviously knew the blond, but he was still wondering why Sakura and Ino were here, they didn't seem to like Naruto all that much. He got his answer when he discovered a pale brunet glaring at him from a corner of his room. Sasuke Uchiha, child prodigy and snob extordinare glared at him as he sat next to the blond, a glare that rivaled his own. Neji just ignored him and turned his concentration towards the object of his affections, obviously the brunet he-bitch was jealous. But Neji was not one who should be talking about he-bitchiness, now was he...

Neji also noticed something out of the corner of his eyes. Was that Shino sending intrigued glances towards the genius Shikamaru? Neji didn't know much about these people, but at least one of them has good taste...

"Oh hi Neji! Thanks for the drink!" The only reply he got from the older boy was in the form of a raised eyebrow. And contrary to popular belief, Naruto can take a hint, but only if and when he wanted to.

"Well, sorry to break up the party, but Neji-sempai and me got some work to do!"

There came a chorus of disappointed groans and then, surprisingly enough, a retort from over in the corner. "That would be 'Neji-sempai and I,' Dobe."

"SHUT UP TEME!" 'Damn, the blond can be really loud if he wants to...'

"Shut up yourself, dobe." was the Uchiha's parting comment.

"Urgh! He makes me sooooo MAD!"

'Well, at least I have no competition there...'

There was an akward silence that stretched only a few minutes, but it seemed like much longer..."Uh, you really don't have to help me with this, you know?"

The smile was breath-taking and Neji had a hard time controlling himself, and the next statement did nothing to help his condition.

"Oh, I know that I don't have to, Neji-san, I'm doing this because I want to!" The smile widened, and started to look a little creepy, almost like he was plotting something... 'But he lacks the mental capacity to plot... or does he?'

Oh, uh... thanks, I guess... so ...um ...ah... what do you want to work on...errrr... first..." Neji artistically cursed himself for sounding so stupid.

"I don't know, what has the closest deadline?"

"That would be the class trip..." Neji smiled as an idea came to him..."So, where do you want to go?"

"Huh, What does that have to do with..." And then Naruto figured it out. It hit him like a speeding train.

"You mean you're letting me pick where we are going for the class trip?" Naruto looked like a deer does when it's looking into the headlights of an oncoming truck.

Neji nodded, thinking at least he could do this for the irrisitble blond. Naruto jumped up and glomped the Hyuga. Neji blushed like crazy, and tried to squirm out of Naruto's death grip.

"Oh thankyouthankyouthankyou!" As expected, the blond was estatic.

"So...ummm...ahh.. where do you want to go?" Neji asked after Naruto let him go and began gloating like a villain.

"Ya' know, I've always wanted to go to an amusement park! One with rollercoasters and stuff!"

Neji looked at Naruto questionably, "You've mean you've never gone to an amusement park before?"

Naruto blushed a little, "Uh, no, I kinda haven't..."

"Alright then, I know of one we could go to..." Damn, at this moment., Neji was sure eager to please.

"Really! Great!... But, uhh..."Naruto blushed again, "Uhh, I've never been on a roller coaster before...soooo, uhhh would...would you go on one with me?" Naruto's face flared an odd color crimson as he timidly finished his question.

This...THIS had made the Hyuga indescribably happy. In only a few words, Naruto had made his day, his month, his whole damn little life. Now he could die happy.

"Sure, I don't mind." Neji couldn't hide his smirk anymore, now if only that damn Uchiha was here...

Neji was taken by surprise as the eternally grateful blond launched himself at the Hyuga and planted a kiss on him without thinking about it.

But nothing compared to Naruto's surprise when Neji started to kiss him back...

to be continued

Rants: Yay! Cliffy! Well, if you liked how this chapter was, gimme' a hoot, and I'll keep writing like this, cuz it would save me a lot of time, although it might end up being completely random and lose its plot... ok, so, maybe not...

(1) In case you didn't know Mountain Dew is a lemon-lime flavored pop that has extreme amounts of caffeine and sugar in it...sorry if I am stating the obvious, but it's better safe that sorry

Damn. I want some cookies! Buys large boxes of cookies

shoves them all in her mouth at the same time

chokes

dies

...all of her imaginary friends cheer

is resurrected by Joe, the friendly necromancer

Sara-chan: Ha! You cannot get rid of me that easily! invader zim type laugh

Joe the friendly necromancer: Yes, but now... YOU ARE MY SLAVE! BWA-HA-HA-HA-HAchoke, hack, cough ...damn, I swallowed my mint...


	3. Second verse same as the first, a little...

Disclaimer:Meh ( translation:no, I don't own Naruto, silly gooses)

Summary: Ng (translation: Sillies, You should know this by now! XD)

Notes: Meh. Today I'm feelin' lazy, and I don't want to do anything, so you should feel lucky that I even moved my lazy ass off my bed and army-crawled my way a whole 2 FEET to my computer. A WHOLE 2 FEET! My gosh, how much do you people expect me!

the door is brutally kicked down, enter best friend Alex

Weird old Chinese man voice, you know, like the one dude from Jackie chan adventures, Uncle, or something

Alex: SAAAAAAAAAAAAAARAAAAAAAAAAAbreaths AAA!

Saaaaaaaaaaraaabreaths aaa: Um, what do want?

Alex:…I forgot…

Saaaaaaaaaaraaabreaths aaa: So you interrupt my uber-creative processes for your idiocy? Miserable wretch!

Alex: Oh! Wait, I remember!…

Saaaaaaaaaaraaabreaths aaa: And?

Alex: damn, I forgot…

Imaginary friend: Wow… those two …. they are just…shudders

Alex: I REMEMBER! You horrible person! Just because I left you ALL by your lonesome for two WHOLE weeks,while I was screwing around in Florida, and rubbing it in that you were stuck up north in the ice-cold winter, doesn't mean that you can say that I am no longer necessary as a friend! whips out the chainsaw of bloody dismemberment

Saaaaaaaaaaraaabreaths aaa: but…but …THEY BRIBED ME WITH COOKIES! hides behind a well placed and convenient large brick wall

Alex: Yay! Cookies… BUT THAT DOESN'T ATONE FOR YOUR SINS! ominous revving of chainsaw

Saaaaaaaaaaraaabreaths aaa:…You …You can have some if you want…holds up pile of cookies, ominous music plays They even come with complementary hypodermic needles and razor blades!

Alex: Yay! Sara, you're my bestest friend!(tbc...I think...)

Saaaaaaaaaaraaabreathsaaa: AW, shit! The beavers are back! Hurry! Hide!runs and hides with faithful shotgun

Yay! Here comes chappie numero 3! does happy dance"

Open fire,

on my burning heart.

I've never been lucky,

in love.

Neji had no idea why he reacted the way he did to Naruto's innocent gesture of thanks. He just couldn't help himself, it was like some one was playing with a voodoo with his face on it, controlling his every move, every reaction. Though, once he had realized what he had done, he made a funny little squeak that he would be ashamed of for the rest of his life, and fled the crime scene.

Throughout this whole ordeal, Naruto had not moved, not shone any sort of reaction for the kiss, but a soon as Neji left the room, he heard an odd sound. It took him a minute to realize that that no, it was not a hysterical reaction on his part, but Naruto was giggling. Not like a mad man, no, but as if one had found something amusing in a ironic manner. This soon turned into full-blown laughter when he noticed Neji peeking in the door way sheepishly.

"Hey! Don't laugh!" Yelled Neji from the other room, still to embarrassed to show his face. The laughter was now hysterical, Naruto choking on air so hard Neji started to worry and came into the room to see if he was alright.

The laughter died immediately when Neji started to pat the poor blonde's back to stop the choking. Neji looked away shyly and didn't see what was coming next. Neji nearly had a heart attack when a warm hand reached over to his cheek and turned his head so that Neji was facing Naruto and Naruto leaned in and softly pressed his lips against the Hyuga's. He watched, mesmerized, as the beautiful blue eyes slid shut and Naruto, his little angel, returned the earlier kiss. ...He could now die a happy man...boy...thing

Neji almost skipped down the hall...well, internally. On the outside no one would be able to tell the difference of his moodfrom every other day, but still, everything was completely different from yesterday. The sun was brighter, the grass greener, the screaming children...Screaming children, wait a second!

Neji rounded the corner quickly to see a group of bullies surrounding a.. a person Neji couldn't see. But it was obvious this gang was seconds from becoming a lynch mob, and what they were screaming caught his attention.

"What the hell are you thinking, you bloody fag! Do you dare contaminate other people with your...your..." The screamer struggled for words, obviously not the brightest crayon in the box."Your faggotiness, Ya' poof!"The speaker blocked Neji's view of their intended victim, but only until the speaker moved forward, intending to beat the living shit out of the person in front of him.

Wait a minute! Neji recognized the shock of wild blond hair! Naruto! His Naruto! They were threatening his angel! With a move not all his own, and with a speed that he never knew he had, he made it just in time to ward the blow away from his precious.

Neji recognized the attackers immediately. It was the school's most formidable gang, Orochimaru and his groupies, the speaker, Kisame What these people wanted with Naruto, he didn't know, but right now they were threatening his property, and that was just begging for an ass-kicking.

"Oooo! Look what we got here! The student council prrrreeeessident. I guess we're in trouble! Whotcha gonna do, exclude us from the class trip?" The freak of nature's mocking tones bothered the Hyuga, and made him do something he never would have otherwise. He sucker punched that motherfucker across the face. Normally he chose to do the moral thing and warn somebody before just whipping out and beating the shit heads into a bloody pulp the exact texture of congealing paste(have you ever done that before, it is quite therapeutic), but this guy just grated his nerves.

Before he knew it, there were spectators watching him repeatedly pound Kisame's face into the floor, and someone had run to fetch a teacher. A well beloved teacher, Iruka-sensei, the science teacher, had come to break up the fight. But boy was he surprised to see what the student council president was doing, and that was obvious by the look of total and udder shock on his face. That only lasted a second, before he dragged both Neji and Naruto, who had joined the fight by the time Iruka had got there, to the principal's office.

They both sat and waited in the secretary's office, under the careful watch of the secretary in question, Shizune. Several times Naruto tried to say something, but was cut off by Shizune. Neji deducted that he was either trying to say sorry for getting him into that fight, or was going to tell him that he was mad at him for interrupting something that he could have handled himself. Neji hoped it was the first reason.

After about twenty minutes, Shizune had got a phone call, and then addressed the truant boys. "The principal cannot come, so the head of the disciplinary office will meet with you. But you must be very respectful towards Tsunade-sama, or you will be severely punished for that too.' she forewarned.

But that still didn't prepare Neji for his first encounter with the head of discipline. She was blond, young, pretty, and was leaning back in a large chair playing cards she probably confiscated from some poor schmoe that had been caught gambling in the lunch room. When she noticed their entrance, she looked up, smiled evilly, and said"Well well well, what have we here?" which was followed by the most insanely evil cackle...

To be continued...

Rants:...hmmm tell me what you think about this chapter, because, right now I am too lazy to bother to have an opinion...

Several loud thuds heard from background, and then a high-pitched girly scream

Sara-chan: Oh, and I almost forgot! We have a special guest today! Isn't that special!holds up a bound and gagged NarutoIsn't he just the cutest?

Naruto: mumph! mumumnumphhhhhh!

Sara-chan:What's that you say? Tell the readers about future plans for this fic?

Naruto:shakes head no violently

Sara-chan: Alright, if you insist!jumps into something that resembles Gai-sensei's 'nice guy' pose, except cooler Okay people! If I keep getting positive response, I promise to try to get this out faster!...But...But I'm thinking about making this a lemony-lime thing...blushes though...I never wrote a lemon before blushes some more and...and I don't know if I can...

struggles from Naruto get more frantic, and gag is ruined

Naruto: QUICK! SOMEBODY HELP ME! YOU DON'T KNOW ALL THE HORRIBLE THINGS SHE DOES TO ME! ABUSE!ABUUUUUUSE!

Sara-chan:Damn, third gag today! Come on, do you think that gags grow on trees? goes to find new gag in her gag closet, which just so happens to be labeled 'gags

opens door

all sorts of S&M paraphenilia fall out, you know, whips, chains, and all that jazz

Sara-chan:...so that's where I put all my supplies from Leather Masters! I was wondering where that went!

Alex:randomly pops in Did I just hear you say 'Leather Masters'?spots Narutoand cackles evilly

Both Sara-chan and Alex:This is gonna be fun...(NOT to be continued...)


	4. RAAAPEEEE! not really

Disclaimer: No, I don't own Naruto! If I did, it would entirely consist of boy smut and bad grammar...hehe, sorry 'bout the last part...

Summary: Definitely not boy smut...yet, that is, but that will soon change if I have my way...eh-heh...

Notes! Yay! I got reviews! SOOOOO HAPPY :does her dorky little happy dance: Well, I must sincerely apologize for my bad grammar, spelling, and use of the word truant! My bad. I hope everyone forgives me :chibi look:

Sara-chan::still doing her happy dance and chanting happyhappyhappy: Oh! Hello! I forgot you were here!...

Imaginary friend: That's because you're the poster-child for ADD. But thank god no one has tried to name us yet :sighs in relief:

Sara-chan: Which reminds me! What about the names for these poor poor nameless people whom I mock because they have no names? I think people forgot about you :laughs evilly: see! I told you no one likes you! HA! Put that in your pipe and smoke it!

Imaginary friend: but...but...:wails: BUT I DON'T HAVE A PIPE::sobs:

Sara-chan: Then you can have mine :hands imaginary friend her bubble pipe, you know, the kind you blow soap bubbles from:

Imaginary friend: ...:sobs::blows nose on sleeve: thanks...:takes pipe and leaves:

Sara-chan: Well, I guess it's time to continue the fic...and to continue my dance :starts dancing again:

Chapter 4

My defenses are down,

a kiss or a frown.

Can't survive on my own.

"Tsunade-baba!" Naruto nearly gave Neji a heart attack then. His jaw dropped. How stupid was this boy, calling the evilly smirking lady that now controlled their fate an extremely offensive name?

"I told you not to call me that! Now get over here, we're gonna play blackjack...oh, and your little friend can play too."

Now Neji's eyes widened to an unhealthy size. Just what in high holy hell was going on in here? Were all these people on crack? Here he was sitting in the head of discipline's office playing cards right after he rearranged a guy's face just down the hall not more than a half an hour ago. Well, not that he was complaining, it was that he was hoping to impress Naruto by getting them out of trouble by using his oh-so-mysterious powers as president of student council. Now he was sitting here looking like a chump and losing to Naruto in a stupid card game. It was obvious that Naruto was down here a lot, from the way these two talked to each other.

"Hey, onibaba(1) where's ton-ton?" Many things were flung in Naruto's general direction after he called her a devil woman. Several hit their mark, leaving the blonde cowering in the nearest corner, and then when the barrage did not stop, he hid behind the nearest thing that could be used as a shield, which , was in fact, Neji himself. Only when a mechanical pencil bounced off Neji's forehead did Tsunade stop throwing things.

"Opps, sorry errr, Neji, was it?"

"It's alright" He replied coolly. He looked up at the clock, they had been there for almost 3 hours, and had missed lunch. In fact their last class would end in about 15 minutes. "May we go now?"

"Oh, Ah, yes! ...And if any one asks, you were doing paperwork the whole time!" She winked at both boys as they left.

"Gaawwwd! I am so hungry!" Naruto complained as they made their way back to Neji's co-ed dorm, the finest one the Konoha University had to offer.

"Do you want to go get something to eat?"

Naruto smiled his brightest and said "That's the best thing I have heard all day!" And then proceeded to grab Neji by the hand and drag him off to one of the many food stalls that were around there.

'He's holding my hand...He's holding my hand...' Was the only coherent thought that the Hyuga had.

A shadow moved across the wall, one among many, watching the two boys as one led the other towards a more crowded part of campus. The kidnapping would have to wait for another time, when there would be less witnesses...

Neji watched in amazement as the blond sitting next to him ate ANOTHER bowl of ramen, but he had lost count after the 11th. Where was Naruto putting all this food? Was his stomach some sort of abyss, without a bottom?

The owner of the little stall smiled at Naruto, and said he'd just put it on the tab. Was it just him, or did all adults seem to have a soft spot for his little angel,...not that he blamed them though, he would do almost anything to keep the other boy happy.

Neji was pulled out of his musings as Naruto tapped him on the shoulder and indicated that they should leave. Neji agreed with that assessment, and he was ready to go when he spotted one Uchiha Sasuke glaring at them from the other end of the stall. And to his surprise, Naruto glared back, took Neji's hand in his, stuck his tongue out and turned to leave...Okay, so that was REALLY suspicious, but Neji was yet again being dragged back to his dorm by Naruto and did not have any time to ponder this discovery.

Back at the dorm, Neji was being tempted...That was, what was really going on was that they were both working on the plans for the trip , which was okayed by the principal, Hatake Kakashi, obviously he was convinced by the science teacher, Iruka-sensei. Iruka was another adult that would obey Naruto's every whim... okay, so maybe not every one, but still. And there was also something obviously going on between the science teacher and the principal, or Neji was the Queen of England.

Back to the story... Well, here they were, trying to work on the paper work for the trip, and poor Neji couldn't concentrate on a damn thing other than Naruto. He was just so damn close, Neji could reach out and touch him if he wanted to. But he also knew that if he touched Naruto, he would probably end up molesting the poor child, and that would be a BAD thing.

Neji watched the temptation as he read quietly to himself, forming the words with his mouth, but no sound coming out. He watched as Naruto wrinkled his nose at a word he did know, and bite his bottom lip as he then wrote something down. Neji just stared and stared and stared, not noticing what he was doing for a good twenty minutes. When he finally caught himself and forced his eyes away he noticed the pen trail he had accidentally made on his paper...Actually, there were several of them.

Neji stood up and shook his head. "Do you want to take a break?"

"Sure...Hey, Neji, you spell midget with a "d" right?(2)"

"WHA!"

"Eh-heh... just kidding...umm...can I have a drink?"

"Sure, let me get you one, Mountain Dew right?" Neji had made sure to buy Mountain Dew earlier for the boy.

"Uh, yeah...hey, you remembered! There was that dazzling smile again.

Neji nodded and smiled and went to the vending machine in the lobby. He hummed a little tune as he started to go back but a voice behind him stopped him. "Hey, Neji we're ordering pizza. do you want some?"

It was Kiba, still carrying around that dog of his, and Choji, who was grumbling something about wanting barbecue instead.

"No, thanks, I'm kinda busy. Gotta run."

"Well, in that case, would you mind lending a couple buck to the pizza fund for starving students, it's a very respected charity!"

"Grrr" Neji dug into his back pocket and got a 5 out of his wallet and unsuccessfully tried to chuck it into the boy's face, it landed pitifully short, being made of paper and all.

"Thanks bud, I owe ya' one"

"How about taking your turn at cleaning out he showers for a change." he mumbled as he continued his way up the stairs.

When he returned to his room, he heard funny noises through the door, and then a crash. He ran to investigate and heard Naruto yelling, "Sasuke! get off me dammit!"

Neji was horrified at the sight he saw when he entered the room. His little precious was pinned under...UNDER SASUKE...and that was not all, they were on his bed, and Sasuke had ripped Naruto's shirt so that Neji could see his perfect abdomen, with a strange spiral tattoo on it.

And that's when Neji exploded...

To be continued...

Rants: Well, I trying to decide whether or not to kill off Sasuke yet...just kidding! Well, here are some explanations

(1)- onibaba is devil women, in case you didn't know that...

(2)about the midget thing... well, my friend Al, (AKA: hogo-chan) asked what I wanted for my birthday, so I made a list. But before I gave it to her I asked her that question...and then she stole it and put it in one of her fics :growls like a cornered wombat: and ever since then we have had a custody disagreement about that...not that you care though

Imaginary friend that now possesses a pipe: I care :hugs Sara-chan::head is bitten off::runs around like a headless chicken:

Joe the friendly necromancer: How many times have we gone over this! You are supposed to act like a good little slave! Good little slaves DO NOT go around and eat people!

Sara-chan:...but...but...

Joe the friendly necromancer: NO BUTS! TWENTY LASHINGS FOR YOU!

Sara-chan::is beaten within an inch of her life:...owwie...re...remember ...to...to re...review...:dies again:


	5. in which there are goatsnot really

Summary:...I will not lie to you...I'm making this shit up as I go...sorry if it sucks...

Disclaimer: you know the drill...at least I should hope so...

Notes: OMG! It's been sooooo friggin' long! I'm Sooooooo sorry minna-san...Gomen nasai...but...but I've been sooooo busy lately, that I haven't been able to get to this! But I do have good news, and that is that I now have Internet access at my house, which means that I have e-mail, which means that I am now looking for a beta! Any volunteers?

Imaginary friend: Pisawh! no ones even reading this anymore, cuz you took so damn long to update, wench!

Sara-chan: Says who?

Imaginary friend: Says ME!

Sara-chan:Sniffles: you...you...YOU ARE SOOOO HORRIBLE! WHY! WHY MUST YOU ALWAYS BURST MY BUBBLE LIKE THAT! I HATE YOU ALL:runs away sobbing:

Joe the friendly necromancer: Hey, have you seen Sara-chan anywhere? I have some grueling and/or meaningless tasks for her to do..

Imaginary friend: Yeah, she went that way, but she needs to do her damn story first

Joe the friendly necromancer: And why would you care if she gets that done?

Imaginary friend: Because not only is she getting threat letters to update, but so are we..

Joe the friendly necromancer: oh, so that's what those flaming letters in the mail were for...(not to be continued)

Chapter 5

And if a girl walks in

andcarves her name

in my heart

Iturn and walk away

Neji paused, taking in the spectacle in front of him...but only for a second before he quickly crossed the room, grabbed Sasuke's collar, and heaved the other brunette across the room. Sasuke hit the wall with a thud, all his breath coming out in a loud 'oof'. Naruto scrambled up off the bed, and tried to hide as much skin as possible with his torn shirt.

"Get...The...FUCK...Out..."Neji grunted, trying, unsuccessfully, to reign in his anger. He clenched his hands, nails drawing blood. This bitch had better leave right now, or a week later, someone would finally notice the smell, and come in to find a lovely little smear of Sasuke across the wall.

"This doesn't concern you." said the brunette as he gingerly picked himself off the floor.

"That might be a little more convincing if you weren't in my room. Neji shot back. Both boys glared at each other for a while, until Sasuke backed down, and sidled out of the room, shooting back one last glare before closing the door.

"Naruto...what the hell was that?" Neji asked as he turned around to face the blond, but instead of an answer, he got an eyeful of naked-Naruto-chest, seeing as how the smaller boy had given up on trying to salvage the shirt and just chucked it on the floor. A rush of blood went to his...nether regions (author giggles at this point) and some almost came out his nose...Scratch that, it did, as Naruto flopped back down on his bed, stretched out and looked up at him with his "come hither" eyes. Yet Neji was too busy staring to notice. Naruto did, though, and laughed a little at Neji's predicament.

"Well, you see, it really is a long story..."

Well, it turned out to be a really long story, filled with useless information that was typical to Naruto, but the gist of it was that Sasuke and Naruto used to date, with Naruto emphasizing the "used to" part, and that Sasuke's brother, who had killed Sasuke's whole family ('So that's where he gets it from!' thought Neji), was now trying to devastate his little brother's life, and was now trying to get to everything that was near and dear to him... which somehow included Naruto, though Naruto obviously left the other boy. Neji wondered if Sasuke still had feelings for Naruto, which would explain the glares, if his bitchy personality didn't already.

"Well, that's about it..." Naruto finished.

Neji blanched. "Is that all you have to say when there is some sort of psychopathic killer, who had no qualms in just randomly killing his whole family, is now targeting you!"

"What do you want me to do, write a will?" Naruto retorted.

If possible, Neji got even paler. "And you're telling me that Sasuke ripped your shirt, and was mounting you on MY bed just to warn you about this?"

At that Naruto flinched, and looked at the floor, "Ahh, y..yes" He stuttered out, blushing faintly, which Neji thought to be endearing. "...Sorry 'bout that..."

Neji. in turn, just leaned forward and lightly touched his lips to Naruto's. Naruto gasped at the sensation, and then kissed back, revealing in the pleasure of the contact. Neji pulled back. "You know I was worried shitless when I walked in here to find that bastard on top of you, and then you go and tell me that a serial killer is after you because of him, and you expect me not to kill him..." Neji remarked lazily.

"Hey, I got first dibs!" Naruto shouted in his ear, causing Neji to jump at how loud that idiot could be. As he moved backward to look at Naruto's face, the blond grabbed his arm and pulled him down into a kiss, a slow luxurious one, with enough time to take a breath in between so they could keep kissing like that forever. Neji lost all coherent thought, and the next thing he knew, he was pinning down the blond onto his bed, as the smaller boy squirmed a little in his arms.

"Knock Knock! Pizza's here if you guys want some...and I know Naruto's in there!" Kiba's annoying voice rang throughout the room. Naruto groaned and shoved a petrified Neji off him.

"I'm hungry, will you lend me a shirt so we can go out there and get some pizza?"

"Sure" Neji grumbled, his body protesting at the loss of warmth. He shuffled on over to his dresser and pulled out his one and only orange shirt and chucked it at the boy. The only reason he had ever bought that shirt was because it reminded him of that little idiot, and was pleased to hear Naruto's little exclamation of joy at seeing the divine color. "Neji, I didn't know you liked the color orange!" He said excitedly.

"I...Nevermind..." Neji was pretty close to telling him that little secret, but didn't know how the blond would react. But by then the blond was already bouncing out the door towards the smell of pizza.

"Sure, it's not ramen, but pizza really is a nutritious food, you see, you've got the carbs, the dairy, the meat, and fat categories down with one little piece, so you really can't go wrong!" Naruto was explaining his outrageous diet to a very uninterested Kiba, who kept making side glances at Neji as if to say "dear god, help me!" but Neji wasn't going to save the boy anytime soon, his silent revenge at how Kiba had interrupted them earlier while they were...uh...yeah...making out.

"But ramen on the other hand..." It was going to be a looooong night...

The next day at school was an almost pleasant experience. He had gotten to go and play cards with Naruto and Tsunade-sama again, under the facade of finishing the paperwork they were assigned as punishment. It was almost lunch time as they finished up, Naruto the grand champion, Neji in second, and Tsunade deadlast. Who would have thought Naruto to be so very good at gambling...

They were both heading to the lunch room when Naruto suddenly blurted out that he had to pee. As he raced of to the men's bathroom down the hall, Neji followed behind at a slower pace. When he reached the door, he stood outside waiting for Naruto to come out. Suddenly he had a very bad feeling as he felt something tug at the sleeve of his uniform. He whirled around to see a girl standing behind him, looking extremely shy as she shoved a letter into Neji's face, and started babbling.

"Neji-sama..i've..I've always liked you...and ...I hoped..." Neji started to reply to her when all of the sudden she threw herself at him and attacked his face with hers. Coincidentally, this was the exact moment Naruto exited the bathroom, ready to make some disgusting comment that was hilarious only to him. Neji watched Naruto's face when he saw the girl kissing him. He thought he saw something spark in the younger boy's eyes, but it was gone before Neji could figure out what it was.

"Hey, get a room!" Naruto remarked loudly instead. This brought the girl that was clinging to him back to reality. At least she had the decency to look mortified. Neji turned and started to walk away from the girl.

"N-Neji-s-s-sempai?" She blustered out, talking to the boy's back. Neji was just going to ignore the girl, as he always did, but Naruto nudged his arm and looked up at him admonishingly. 'Naruto...sometimes I hate what you do to me...'

"I'm sorry, but I don't like you that way. He said coolly

"I-Is there somebody else...t-t-that y-you like!" The girl blurted out again. Neji was surprised at her audacity. Then he looked straight at Naruto and said, "Yeah, there is..."Naruto blushed.

The final bell had rung, signaling that school was over for the day. A very bouncy Naruto followed Neji across campus to his dorm. "End of the daaay!" Naruto sang, loudly and very off key. "End of the day! Eeeend ooooffff the DAAAAAAAAY! NOW IT'S TIME TO PLAY" Sometimes Neji wondered about this boy.

"Hey Neji-kun, aren't we nearly done with the class trip papers yet?" Naruto asked excitedly.

"...No."

"Hey! why not!"

"...because we're not...we still have to get everything finalized, then make sure we have all the student's permission slips, and other such menial tasks"

"And you have to do this all the time?"

"...yes."

"...sucks to be you"

"That's the understatement of the year"

"Huh?"

"Nevermind..."Neji looked away from Naruto, and focused on opening the door to his room...how he ever got here while staring at Naruto(Author says: More like molesting him with your eyes, perv) the whole time he would never know.

Both boys entered the room and Neji locked the door behind him. Naruto was just about to question him when there was a loud banging on the door.

"Hey Naruto! You in there! I KNOW you are! Where's that damn money you owe me!" Neji nodded at the door, as the boy outside had unknowingly given him an excuse.

"...Oh...I see...good idea..."

Neji smirked at the little flush that had appeared on the boy's face.

"NARUTO! GET OUT HERE DAMMIT!"

"Shut up Konohamaru" Naruto responded weakly to the boy that was currently making a fool of himself on the other side of the door.

Neji's smirk widened as he cornered Naruto against the wall beside the door. "What was that 'oh...I see' about?" Neji pressed a little closer. "What did you think I did that for?"

Naruto looked into the almost predatory eyes of the boy above him and squirmed. "Umm, well...umm"

"Oh, I know EXACTLY what you were thinking...and...I think you have the right idea..."

Naruto flushed a crimson red when he heard Neji's words. His eyes widened to an unhealthy size and Neji enjoyed every minute of teasing the boy. He bent down to kiss him, and to his surprise Naruto responded by kissing him back, hard. Neji gasped at the sensation, and Naruto took that opportunity to slide his tongue into the other boy's mouth. As Naruto started whirling the tip of his tongue against his Neji let out a loud moan. Naruto attacked more fiercely, until he breathlessly pulled away and said "b-bedroom"...Neji was floored

(To be continued)

Sara-chan: Well, I know it's a cliffy, but if I don't cut it off here, I...I

Alex: ;;Randomly showing up out of nowhere;; You just don't want to take the time to write it out now, you lazy ass

Sara-chan:...shut up..

Alex: Anywho, you know who is really hot...that necromancer dude (AN: in case you didn't know, a necromancer is a person who uses magic to bring back the dead and use them as slaves) ...but I need to know more about him before...

Sara-chan: Before you put out for him?

Alex: WTF BITCH! no... umm... well, anywho, I want to know the most important thing first...

Sara-chan: which is?

Alex: his financial status, you dweeb.

Sara-chan:...I'm not going to lie to you...

Alex: you don't know do you?

Sara-chan:...no...but I'm sure he's DEAD BROKE!...hehehehehe:laughs hysterically at her own stupid joke until she is beaten into oblivion by Alex:

Sara: well, remember to review, cuz if you don't...well, I could always cut open your abdomen with a spork, force-feed you your own spleen, and then use the rest of your entrails to hang you from a flagpole...


	6. NOTICE!

Sorry people, but due to illict :giggles: reasons i can't post it here. i hope you'll go and read it, and then YOU SHALL REVIEW! REEEEEEEEEEEVIEEEEEEEEEEWWWWW!

link to new chappie in profile! please go and read it!


	7. woot!

Summary: Feh.

Disclaimer: Keh.

Notes: Well, it's been awhile...sorry minna-san! i really didn't mean to wait this long to update but...but...but cries chokes dies Well, now that that is out of the way, i shall try and continue! Onwards and upwards as i always say! But that doesn't make any sense so i might as well shut up and stop looking so very stupid...eh-heh...

Chapter Seven:The plot thickens...and then congeals...eww, gross

It gets in your eyes

It's making you cry

Don't know what to do

(Don't know what to do)

(Note: The (...) means an echo)

Neji couldn't believe it. It had started two weeks ago, the first time they...they uhhhhh...slept together (Neji blushes), and almost every night since, Naruto had spent the night in his arms. Neji had never been happier, even when they were trying to explain to a traumatized Konohamaru what they really WERE doing (which just so happened to be watching a movie very loud, and Neji had fallen asleep, and Naruto couldn't wake him up, so Naruto was being an ass and yelling Neji's name like that. The boy had looked skeptical at first , but bought the story to save his own sanity).

But now it was time for the school trip. Neji had made sure it was perfect, down to the very hotel room the two boys were staying in, in the same room together. That had taken some string pulling, but it was worth it, and he didn't mind calling in all the favors many of the faculty at school owed him. He had even managed to get on the same bus, even though he was in a different grade and class. This was going to go perfectly...or so he thought.

Until after they had settled into their single room. When the hotel had said they hadn't had enough double rooms to accomidate both boys and girls, he had given the boys the double rooms, 2 to a room, and the girls the singles, but that arrangement wouldn't work because 2 boys would be left with out a double room. This had given him a great idea, and he offered to take it, along with his "one friend". And thus the single bed in their room, which they would share, much to his delight. Until after they had settled into their room.

There were screams from down the hall, and several loud noises. Both boys left their room to go see what the desturbance was. A large group was gathered in front of one of the boy's room's door. Huddling in to try and find out what happened. Neji pushed to the front of the crowd and into the room.

The room was a disaster area, shattered glass all over the floor, dressers and desks turned upside down, bedding every where, both the windows smashed and a cold wind was blowing through the room. But that was not all, upon closer inspection, Neji found Kiba, unconciuos and stuffed in a closet. Neji took charge of the situation.

"Chouji, go get the teachers, Shikamaru, go find his room mate...uhhh...ummmm..." He couldn't remember who he had put with the annoying dog boy...and then it hit him like a speeding truck, the Uchiha! "Get Sasuke, and see if he knows any thing, Lee, go get the hotel manager and report a break-in." Chouji waddled off as fast as he could, Shikamaru slinked off in the same general direction, and Lee, ever the over-enthusiastic creepy kid, saluted and sprinted to the elevator. Neji sat down on the bed that wasn't covered in glass shards and started swearing under his breath.

Iruka was the first teacher to arrive, and he nearly had a heart attack at what he saw. He immediately pulled himself together, and pulled Kiba out of the closet (authoress giggles, no pun intended) Soon he was followed by Asuma, Kurenai, and Kakashi. Then the hotel manager, and the Sasuke, who had been in the lobby buying snacks out of the vending machines. All stood and gawped at the sight before the manager went and called to cops. The police arrived in no time, and deemed it was a break-in, with no fault to the residents. Everyone was hustled out and there was police tape put up. They wouldn't even let the two boys get their stuff. Which left Sasuke and Kiba without a room. But it really didn't matter so very much to Kiba, seeing as how he was still unconscious. Kiba was taken to the medical center in the hotel for treatment, which STILL left Sasuke with out a room, or clothes, or hygene necessities.

Iruka was the first to remember that fact and chose a new room for him. "Well, let's see...since you and Naruto are such good friends, why don't you sleep in his room!" Iruka proposed. Before either Naruto or Neji could refuse, Sasuke agreed to this plan, while smirking in Neji's general direction.

Sasuke followed the grumbling boys to their room, but stopped short at the door. "Why is there only ONE bed!" He asked increduously. The look on his face was priceless to Neji.

"Well, you should know that already..." Neji said cryptically. Sasuke blanched...and stopped breathing...and looked like he was having a coronary at what he insinuated.

"Yeah, when they said they didn't have enough double rooms, me 'n' Neji offered to share a single" Naruto said as he bounced over to the bed.

"Then where are all of us going to sleep? We can't all fit in that bed"

"Well, since it's your fault you're in here..."Neji started

"IT'S NOT MY FAULT!"

"OH, yes it is, i vote you sleep on the floor."

"No fucking way"

"Yes fucking way"

"NO FUCKING WAY!" Sasuke launched himself at Neji, who faught back. Their little scuffle ended quickly when Naruto said "Hey I got an idea!"

"Really, i thought you were incapable of a thought process, dobe" Sasuke snapped.

"HEY, That's not true! Beat him up Neji!"

"With pleasure"

"I was kidding!"

"Idiot"

"Well, do you want to hear my idea or not!"

"...Fine what is it?"

Narutop smiled gratefully at Neji, the gesture not lost to Sasuke.

"I say we play cards" Naruto pulls out a pack of cards from his bag.

"And how the hell is that going to solve anything, retard?"

small scuffle ensues

Naruto smiles evilly and says "T he loser sleeps in the bath tub, the other two share the bed, agreed?"

The two brunettes looked at each other, glaring enough to make plants wilt.

"Agreed" they said at the same time

Twenty minutes later

Both Neji and Sasuke were dumbfounded. Never...Never in a milloinn years... Why did the world hate them so? Did they do something wrong in a past life or something? What sort of demon would do this to them?

The blond demon looked up and smiled, "Sorry guys, i guess i lost, eh-heh..."

The world had now witnessed the beginning of the apocalyspe.

(TBC! i hope!)

Notes: well, seeing as how it's been like, forever, i've decided that if i don't get more than five reviews for this chapter, i shan't continue this tstory, and deem it dead. Sorry if that disappionts you, but i've made up my mind. And if i do get enough reviews, i am now looking for a beta reader for this and other stories! Tell me if you want too!and i shall choose the best person (or whom ever bribes me the most!)


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